Background: By the time families of someone with an eating disorder find their way to treatment professionals, they often are feeling scared, exasperated, and powerless. Teaching families the communication technique of validation gives them an important tool to reconnect with their loved one and disentangle themselves from fruitless power struggles.
Validation: How to Help Families Help Their Loved One
By Jennifer R. Henretty, PhD &
Jamie Atkins, RD
I. Definition of validation and its use in various therapy modalities
II. Why validation is important
A. The role invalidation can play in eating disorder onset and maintenance
i. As it relates to family dynamics
ii. As it relates to temperament
iii. As it relates to social media
iv. As it relates to peer culture and bullying
v. As it relates to alexithymia
vi. As it relates to trauma
vii. As it relates dietarily to biology
a. basic human drive
B. The role validation can play in eating disorder recovery
i. As it relates to emotional expression
ii. As it relates to denial and resistance
iii. As it relates to family connectedness
iv. As it relates to empowerment
v. As it relates dietarily to biology
a. intuitive eating
III. How validation creates change
IV. Levels of validation
V. Why intuitive and well-intentioned alternatives to validation don’t work
VI. Audience participation identifying validating and non-validating statements
VII. AVS (Acknowledge/Accept, Validate, Soothe)
VIII. Audience experiential exercise
A. Partners pair up and one person shares or role-plays an uncomfortable experience and the partner provides validating statements and well-intentioned non-validating experiences
B. Partners switch roles
IX. Why validation is important for the dietary aspect of recovery
A. Invalidation as causing power struggles
B. Validation of feelings via understanding of dietary beliefs
C. Mealtime and beyond: Noticing without policing
D. Words families can use to encourage recovery-oriented behaviors
i. Emphasis on feelings
X. Self-validation
A. The importance of it during treatment for families and loved one
B. The importance of it during recovery
C. The benefit it has for clinicians
i. self-care
ii. modeling
iii. empathy
XI. Review and conclusion
By the time families of someone with an eating disorder find their way to treatment professionals, they often are feeling scared, exasperated, and powerless. Teaching families the communication technique of validation gives them an important tool to reconnect with their loved one and disentangle themselves from fruitless power struggles. Invalidation, which can be well-intentioned and loving, often can be part of a familial culture (e.g., "look on the bright side"). Furthermore, personality temperament, peer culture--especially bullying, social media, and trauma also often are experienced as invalidating. Eating disorders, in that they are denying oneself of the most basic of human needs--that of nutrition, can be seen as the ultimate form of invalidating oneself. Validation, on the other hand, can play an important role in eating disorder recovery. Validation is the place to begin with a client that is resistant to treatment or in denial. Validation is a way to combat alexithymia and facilitate the development of age-appropriate emotional expression. Validation is a way to empower the client to choose recovery. And although validation is an incredible tool for clinicians to utilize, sharing that tool with clients' families not only fosters connectedness and relationship repair, but also allows families to create a home environment conducive to recovery. In order for families to be able to generate validation in moments of stressful eating disorder behavior, psychoeducation can be provided on levels of validation (e.g., from attentive listening and nodding to repeating and relating). Just as important, families need to be provided examples of well-intentioned, often loving, but invalidating statements such as "it could be worse," "look at all you have," "don't waste your tears," etc. Additionally, families need to learn the role of validation in relation to the dietary portion of recovery; specifically by practicing languaging their concerns with an emphasis on emotional expression rather than on policing statements. Lastly, families (and clinicians!) will benefit from learning how to self-validate in that it allows them to practice self-care, model for their loved ones, and build empathy. This presentation will include experiential exercises.
Jennifer Henretty graduated summa cum laude with her BA from Ohio Wesleyan University before earning her PhD at the University of Memphis, where she was awarded the prestigious S.Howard Bartley Award and the Society of Psychotherapy Research’s Enrico E.Jones Award. She has been in the therapeutic industry for 10+ years, treating EDs in adolescent and adult populations and working in all five levels of care. She has authored multiple publications, and serves as a board member of the iaedp LA Chapter, is a member of AED, and functions as the Director of Research and Program Director for Center for Discovery.
Jamie is a Registered Dietitian with a passion for food. Since completing her Bachelors of Science, studying nutrition and psychology at California State University of Long Beach and her Dietetic Internship, she helps people meet their nutritional needs without losing sight of the social and emotional value of food. With a non-judgmental approach, Jamie helps people create a healthy relationship between food, mind, & body. She is mindful of how scary nutritional change often is, and she empowers people through kindness and knowledge. Jamie has worked with Center for Discovery since 2007, and supports clients where they are in recovery.
